When asked to borrow money: "I'll see what my lawyer says. . . . And if he says yes I'll get another lawyer."

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted.

The man in our society is the breadwinner; the woman has enough to do as the homemaker, wife and mother.

If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.

How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil'ss Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon - and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.

In the Bible, the opposite of Sin, with a capital 'S, ' is not virtue - it's faith: faith in a God who draws all to himself in his resurrection.

We should learn to smile as we fall, So much so as when we have it all.

Man has his will - but woman has her way.

Listen to the desires of your children. Encourage them and then give them the autonomy to make their own decision.

The best proof of man's dissatisfaction with the home is found in his universal absence from it.

Being a male is a matter of birth. Being a man is a matter of choice.

I have noticed that doing the sensible thing is only a good idea when the decision is quite small. For the life-changing things, you must risk it.

I've always said I've got the coolest fans, and I brag about you like grandchildren when I talk to other artists.

All right, I am often brash, rude and brutally direct. Someday I'm going to die and I don't have time to toe-dance around the periphery of hatred.

There is one group of people - social conservatives, religious conservatives - who honestly feel that women's place is in the home and that wives should submit to their husbands.