When insane things start to arrange themselves in sane patterns around you, you know you got problems.

Valhalla on the right. Paradise regained on the left. Stuck between a Godiva truffle and a chocolate eclair. Between a rock and a very hard place. Two very hard places from the looks of it.

I'm sorry your pretty little world got all screwed up, but everybody's does, and you go on. It's how you go on that defines you.

Oh, drop the act, Tinkerbell, and get rid of my problem. Then we’ll talk.

That part of his body was simply uncontrollable, apparently functioning in accordance to a single law of nature: She existed--he got a hard-on.

There should be a vaccine against Adam Black. And all women should be given it at birth.

Some people bring out the worst in you, others bring out the best, and then there are those remarkably rare, addictive ones who just bring out the most. Of everything.

Life's a choice: you can live in black and white, or you can live in colour. I'll take every shade of the rainbow and the gazillion in between!

It's often only in the lies we refuse to speak that any truth can be heard at all.

Nobody looks good in their darkest hours. But it's those hours that make us what we are.

The most confused we ever get is when we're trying to convince our heads of something our heart knows is a lie.

We must teach our people the principle of trust

Physical features count little unless they are illumined from within.

I do believe a young lady can't be too careful who she marries.

The true harbinger of spring is not crocuses or swallows returning to Capistrano, but the sound of the bat on the ball.

I absolutely would categorize myself as one of successful professional females. I think you can be successful and still be extremely present in a healthy life.

A sweetheart is a bottle of wine, a wife is a wine bottle.

I discovered that the more I hustled, the luckier I seemed to get.

I have nothing to do with the selection of stories. I'm the reporter.

Tis better never to be named than to be ill spoken of.