When they’re together, the world could fall apart around them and they’d never notice or care as long as they have each

Fifty percent of all doctors graduate in the bottom half of their class - Hope your surgery went well!

Daddy, What's the horizontal tango?

dear kiara, The women in the shop told me that yellow rose represents friendship and red rose shows love. And the rosery is the only thing i own that i care for, its yours i'm yours C

Okay, seriously, I dont know if this is true or not, but I heard people who use profanity are trying to compensate for their lack of you know... size" -Tuck

And while my mind is telling me I'm flirting with her just to prove a point, my body wants to play "you show me your perky privates and I'll show you mine.

Consider me your candy stripper... I mean striper.

Can I request another peer guide, One who isn't so happy to be at school at 7:30 a.m.?

Tofu tacos are not Mexican. I think putting tofu on anything and calling it Mexican is an insult to my people.

Do I hear a challenge?” she whispers, “Oh, Carlos. You know I can’t resist a challenge.

Look at me, chica." When she does, I repeat, "Eres hermosa.""What does it mean?""You're beautiful.

Needless documentation hampers performance.

I had never done a roast, but I really wanted to, because it's so different from standup.

The body of an actor can be either his best friend or his worst enemy.

I think when you have surgery on any part of your body, it's never going to be the same.

Self-absorption intensifies isolation, but permits it to go unnoticed.

A crucified Savior is not well served by self-pleasing, self-indulging people.

We are incarcerating more people on a per capita basis in California than any country in the world other than South Africa or the Soviet Union.

The most fun I ever had on a movie was working with Albert Brooks. He's the caviar of comedy. I mean, nobody's funnier; nobody is smarter than Albert Brooks.

The efforts of Black Lives Matter to bring attention to the all-too-frequent instances of unjustified violence being used by policemen may not be paying off as quickly as some might hope.

Christianity is a battle, not a dream.