When women go off together we call it separatism. When men go off together we call it Congress.

A friend of mine said, no matter what I do I always look like an English teacher. She actually said, you still look like a Campbell's Soup kid.

Moms Mabley said you have to say good things about the dead. I say, 'He's dead. Good.'

I'm really happy that I was raised Catholic because it's given me years of material.

I consider a CD or a comedy collection as a record of what I've been doing, and I try to wrap it up and start new material.

The Administration's policy on women is often hard to see because it is written in the font size of pharmaceutical ads.

Whenever a woman describes herself as a 'post-feminist' I picture women lashed to posts. Joan of Arc was an early post-feminist.

Teaching is performance art.

[On cloning sheep:] Oh great, just what we need - more sheep.

My style has been pretty much like a newspaper. It's got politics in it, it's got media, sports, family relations, you know, all the sections you would expect, and wonderful religion things.

So few people voted in the elections [of 1996] that the ones who did were called activists.

How could I have ever been ashamed of loving Dante Quintana?

You can accomplish your goals by grace.

To taste the sea all one needs is one gulp.

Believe me, I don't like being photographed. I don't like myself in pictures. Actually, I do sometimes.

I had always thought of starting my own record company. I haven't regretted the decision - yet!

If your audience is young, it'd be youth culture, if your audience is older, it'd be older people, if it were senior citizens, it'd be senior citizen issues. So you try and hit the target audience.

No one's raising children any more. To love a child, you've got to work for it. You have to change its diapers and feed it at night!

As the love of the heavens makes us heavenly, the love of virtue virtuous, so doth the love of the world make one become worldly.

As countries grapple with modernization, people who are left behind tend to hold firmer and firmer to their view of the evil of modernity.

I find we are growing serious, and then we are in great danger of being dull.