When you die at 72, no matter what you die of, it's natural causes. Even if you get hit by a truck, it's natural causes. 'Cause if you was younger, you'd have got out the way!

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.

Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them.

Everyone has favorite criminals. Mine are pimps. We can all rob a bank; we can all sell drugs. Being a pimp is a whole other thing.

So, to say Barack Obama is progress is saying that he's the first black person that is qualified to be president. That's not black progress. That's white progress.

Wealth is not about having a lot of money; it's about having a lot of options.

The advantage that my children have is that my children are encountering the nicest white people that America has ever produced. Let’s hope America keeps producing nicer white people.

I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.

Most people don't realize this, but you can eat organic, all natural, gluten-free food without telling everyone around you.

Smart is knowing if you're dumb. Knowing when to shut up and to listen to people that are smarter than you.

You know the world is messed up when the tallest man in the NBA is Chinese, the best golfer is black, and the best rapper is white.

The whole world's writing novels, but nobody's reading them.

Scorned and torn, former love mates aim and shoot childish devastating daggers that penetrate beyond target to pierce the heart of their offspring.

The goal is to create a “chit, ” or IOU, so that, assuming you continue to perform well, the organization feels like it owes you the next time.

Misguided good men are more dangerous than honest bad men. It is because they are seen as good that, in and by good conscience, the mob will always, stubbornly back them without question.

In every work of genius we recognize our own rejected thoughts

When I travel I normally eat club sandwiches or I bring my own food. When you go into a new town, it's very had to find a good place to eat.

I think in Europe, movies are made like a commodity and then sold as art.

That's the funny thing about cinema, it is an intellectual medium, but it's also sort of anti-intellectual.

Vince Lombardi says, you know, "In my life, there are three things: God, family and the Green Bay Packers, in that order. For me, it's God, family and Yahoo!, in that order.

You measure a government by how few people need help.