When you're doing stand-up, you can comment if something fails, get a laugh from that.

I think it's almost an indulgence to focus on the dark side of things. And as you get older, you want to focus on the positive.

There are some people who only know me for cornflakes ads, and that's fine. I have a charmed life.

I'm prone to a more depressed outlook on life.

I'm a very, very handsome man, and have had to come to terms with it... um, do I like the way I look? In the right light, and with a following wind.

I don't think any of my kids would have a good word to say about me. I think they deny that they even know me. At school, they pretend they are Anton du Beke's kids.

I just look like someone with a long face. Not just A. P. McCoy himself, but some of the horses he rides.

If you're a comedian, you are looking for material in daily life.

I would have to say my earthy sensuality - although I should point out that the backs of my calves are exemplary and my upper inner thigh is a delight.

I still have lots of friends from my pre-success days.

I think, if you've got children, that's your life. Your 'showbiz' life, if you want to call it that, is a separate thing, and it isn't everything to me.

Character is what the world needs - character that will empower the mind with such an unimaginable strength that one would meet death face to face and say “some other time, pal!

You can choose the quality and the type of reality you experience every day through your focus. What you focus on, you feel.

Every fear fades with faith.

When we drug ourselves to blot out our soul's call, we are being good Americans and exemplary consumers.

A majority of women's magazines feature women who do amazing things, but then the article focuses on how she ruined it with her shoes.

To boldly grow where no one has groan before.

I've never had a car. Like I can drive, but I'm always at the risk of killing people.

Only by living absurdly is it possible to break out of this infinite absurdity.

There is no need to increase the taxes. India can run without troubling the citizens.

I don't try to be satirical. I just try to get what's in my head on the page. And that part is hard for me to do. It takes a long, long time to make it poetic, somewhat essayistic.