When your dad's a cop, calling 911 is really just like calling Dad at work.

I don't expect success. I prepare for it.

Are you stalking me? Because that would be super.

I dragged my wife from our honeymoon in Africa and landed her in Ontario, Canada, when it was -40 degrees.

Laughing can serve you in dark moments and even help you crawl your way back out.

Everyone thinks their baby is a genius. People find it delightfully refreshing when I tell them, My baby? Totally average. Like, 100 percent average.

I just love bikes. It's not the safest passion to have, but I guess it's better than Russian roulette.

There are so few surprises left in life. We've gotten so addicted to knowing. It's the Google generation. We want the answer to everything right now!

If it weren’t so off-putting for my co-workers. I’d wear my flannel, one-piece 'Hannah Montana' pajamas, like, all the time!

I've done things to my body, mechanically, that I'll never do again. I've done stunts that I shouldn't have done 10, 11, 12 times. I've broken a ton of bones on sets.

Guys are lucky: We can wear a suit over and over, just with different shirts and ties.

I heart my job. I get to make things up for a living.

I practice self-love, give love, and surround myself with people who bring out the best in me.

When you first start working, you take whatever job is offered, because you have to build your resume. But you don't think about what you're building.

The sun and moon shine on all without partiality.

The thing that pleases is not always good and, helas, the good thing does not always please.

Republicans have been trying to get people to work for no pay for a long time.

Finally, states have monopolized, or sought to monopolize, armed force.

According to the Mayans, the world is supposed to end in the year 2012. Are you buying that? When's the last time you even ran into a Mayan?

I want my songs to be heard by everyone. I want [everyone] to treat people with compassion. I want them to realize that we are all so similar, but we focus so much on our differences.

The very people you trusted most could become like strangers in their longing.