Where I get bored is when I show up for a shoot and they want me to wear a feather boa. Too obvious a thing for a poof on the telly to do.

A good rule to remember for life is that when it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain.

The only people who are desperate to go on the show are people we're desperate not to have on the show.

I always say I'd rather be miserable by myself than unhappy in a relationship.

I don't think I've got bad taste. I've got no taste.

I am really bad at actually interviewing people.

In my experience the difference between a straight and a bisexual is about four pints

I bet Maurice Gibb's heart monitor was singing the tune of Stayin' Alive.

A comedian's a comedian. They're a very kind of cynical bunch. I guess that's why I like them.

The BBC is a victim of its own independence.

I have nothing to say about my childhood. It was a perfectly pleasant upbringing - it's not like it was unhappy or anything.

Humility is recognizing the fullness of our sin, so we can embrace the fullness of God's mercy.

Exactitude is not truth.

Being with a man incapable of telling a lie – a whole lot of awesome. Being with a man who could taste when you lied – sucked the big one.

We work and that is godlike.

No, Harry, you listen," said Hermione. "We're coming with you. That was decided months ago - years, really.

You might be a redneck if a full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.

My favorite birthday game is Pin the Cleanup on the guests.

The future is a choice between Utopia and oblivion.

But as was so often the case, it was the one person missing who you thought about more than the ones who were right in front of you.

DIY, cricket, automobile repair. I could study it for a lifetime and not produce a word on the carburettor.