Where I'm from, there's two things you don't mess with. You don't mess with a man's woman, or his hat DON'T TOUCH A MAN'S HAT!

When you don't know what you're doing, it's best to do it quickly.

Most things can be fixed with duct tape and extension cords.

Through Jesus, your past is explained, your present has a purpose, and your future is secure. What more could you really want in life?

You can talk any redneck into a challenge. That’s why so many rednecks die in strange ways.

It seems a fine line between being a matador and being a rodeo clown

My parents were hoarders before hoarding was cool

I represent Jesus on this earth and he represents me in heaven.

Most people named Willie are either in prison or on the armwrestling circuit.

You can see the true heart of a man when you're out in the woods with a weapon

If you’re too busy to duck hunt or catch fish, then you’re too busy.

I did not want to be taken for a fool – the typical French reason for performing the worst of deeds without remorse.

The failure of the White House and Congress to seriously address the nation's fiscal situation is certain to broaden the belief among many voters that the U.S. political system is broken.

No person who can read is ever successful at cleaning out an attic.

Homophobia is very, very difficult to root out, to extricate. That's why we have to bear witness. That's why we have to be so public about it, and that's why we can't just play footsie with it.

Only the fact that we are unaware how well our nearest know us enables us to live with them.

Nearly all human beings love, but nearly none know how to love.

My God, but what do I care about the laws of nature and arithmatic if for some reason these laws and two times two is four are not to my liking?

I did not say history was bunk. It was bunk to me . . I did not need it very bad.

I am also four, and twelve, and fifteen, and twenty-three, and thirty-one, and forty-five and . . . and . . . and . . .

To travel, to experience and learn: that is to live.