Whereas Rolling Stone, I just never had anything to do with them. I'd stop by the office maybe twice a year.

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.

Mercedes Benz : A mechanical device that increases sexual arousal in women.

Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin.

A firm, hearty handshake gives a good first impression, and you'll never be forgiven if you don't live up to it.

At the core of liberalism is the spoiled child — miserable, as all spoiled children are, unsatisfied, demanding, ill-disciplined, despotic and useless. Liberalism is a philosophy of sniveling brats.

There's a whiff of the lynch mob or the lemming migration about any overlarge concentration of like-thinking individuals, no matter how virtuous their cause.

Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective.

Watching Republicans in Washington is like watching lemmings, if lemmings jumped into cesspools instead of off cliffs. Splash! There goes Mark Foley!

Authority has always attracted the lowest elements in the human race

Even the most beautiful girl in the world becomes unsightly without depth of character.

...his lazy eye drifting around the room like a child looking for the bathroom.

When anyone tells me I can’t do anything, I’m just not listening any more.

I have commanded that my [titulary] abide like the mountains; when the sun shines its rays are bright upon the titulary of my majesty; my Horus is high upon the standard ... forever.

What's well begun is half done.

Nobody ever remembers who finished second at anything.

It's very rare that someone who is so good at the language of numbers, is as good at the language of life. They're two very different worlds.

You can't be afraid. You can be sad if you like. You can be angry. But it's the fear that'll freeze you in place.

Obamacare takes effect in less than eight months. Do you realize what this means? If you go to the emergency room now, you'll be covered by the time you finally see a doctor.

Get Carter is a classic, but it did nothing in the United States. It came out on a double bill with a Frank Sinatra western.