Wherever there’s a conductor, you’re sure to find a dead composer!

Anyone who gives you a cinnamon roll fresh out of the oven is a friend for life.

Miracles are like meatballs, because nobody can exactly agree on what they are made of, where they come from, or how often they should appear.

Temper tantrums, however fun they may be to throw, rarely solve whatever problem is causing them.

I didn't realize this was a sad occasion.

They didn't understand it, but like so many unfortunate events in life, just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it isn't so.

Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby - awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess.

Chestnuts in stuffing tastes like someone chewed up a tree branch and then French-kissed it into your mouth.

The thing with your heart's desire is that your heart doesn't even know what it desires until it turns up.

Accidents happen all the time.

Morning is an important time of day, because how you spend your morning can often tell you what kind of day you are going to have.

My consciousness is eternal

A memorable heart is the easiest way to immortality.

Socialism is not a science, a sociology in miniature: it is a cry of pain.

I can live with the robber barons, but how do you live with these pathological radicals?

You are a cynical man, Mr. Pleasant." "We live in cynical times, Miss Cain.

Misogyny is the death of the heart.

I always find a couple of hecklers... I'll kinda look at them, stare at 'em, and let them know I can't be stopped.

It's a sensible rule that says before you get a mortgage it should be checked whether you can afford it.

We all need someone who can help us do what we already can.