While working in advertising, I channelled my creative energy into elaborate escape fantasies: cake making, dog breeding, the Peace Corps.

Perhaps the way to succeed is to think of life on Earth as a colossal joke, a creation of such immense stupidity that the only way to live is to laugh until you think your heart will break.

I don't get nearly enough credit in life for the things I manage not to say.

The imagination can be dangerous. It can change the world. And that is why we write.

Self-knowledge is essential not only to writing, but to doing almost anything really well. It allows you to work through from a deep place - from the deep, dark corners of your subconscious mind.

Osbert was the only one who didn't seem suspicious. He was so interested in the Decline of Western Civilization that he missed the version of it taking place under his nose.

This was what happiness felt like - this wondrous, miraculous alternative to dread.

Things Happen and once they start happening you pretty much just to hold on for dear life and see where they drop you when they stop.

If you haven't been in a war and are wondering how long it takes to get used to losing everything you think you need or love, I can tell you the answer is no time at all.

The soldier had stamped my passport FAMILY in heavy black capital letters and I checked it now for reassurance and because I liked how fierce the word looked

Ask any comedian, tennis player, chef. Timing is everything.

Even a blind man could see she is beautiful.

Generally, a woman would rather be married to any man that she doesn’t hate, than remain unmarried to a man that she loves.

The familiar writer is apt to be his own satirist. Out of his own mouth is he judged.

Man is Creation's masterpiece. But who says so?

Do I think I'm under-educated? Academically, absolutely. I never took any exams, no O- or A-levels.

It's just hard," Harry said finally, in a low voice, "to realize he won't write me again

I realized that the people weren't just characters but they were people and they were getting to do something that was so fun and I wanted to be a part of it.

Economics is not a science, in the sense that a policy can be repeatedly applied under similar conditions and will repeatedly produce similar results.

You only have to believe that you can succeed, that you can be whatever your heart desires, be willing to work for it, and you can have it.

I think for a group that has a reputation for being shy and elusive, we're actually outspoken.