Who, other than a crazy person, does anything besides hang up on a robo-call? Any call, any person, anywhere, under any circumstances.

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.

Mercedes Benz : A mechanical device that increases sexual arousal in women.

Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin.

A firm, hearty handshake gives a good first impression, and you'll never be forgiven if you don't live up to it.

At the core of liberalism is the spoiled child — miserable, as all spoiled children are, unsatisfied, demanding, ill-disciplined, despotic and useless. Liberalism is a philosophy of sniveling brats.

There's a whiff of the lynch mob or the lemming migration about any overlarge concentration of like-thinking individuals, no matter how virtuous their cause.

Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective.

Watching Republicans in Washington is like watching lemmings, if lemmings jumped into cesspools instead of off cliffs. Splash! There goes Mark Foley!

Authority has always attracted the lowest elements in the human race

I don't think I'm tough in a so called tough way. I'm tough on myself.

Laughing and crying are really similar - what happens to your body. It's a very similar process in your diaphragm. Like a musician, you have to do your scales once in a while and warm up your voice.

Your life is the sum total of all your choices up to this present minute.

It's a shame because we experienced probably the greatest thing - in art, in pop - we'll ever do. And it would be good to sit around and talk about it.

Especially from the legal end of things, the easiest thing for a big corporation or lawyer to say is no.

Some things just aren't meant to go together. Things like oil and water. Orange juice and toothpaste.

I am beginning to consider myself stronger than all those around me, and you know that the good opinion I have of myself has only been reached after mature consideration.

If our planes were shot down, yes, they's wake me right away. If the other fellows' were shot down, why wake me up?

That was the one thing I had going for me. Taking care of your family.

Intelligent Design opens the whole possibility of us being created in the image of a benevolent God.