Who says there's an unemployment problem in this country? Just take the five percent unemployed and give them a baseball stat to follow.

Last year we had so many people coming in and out they didn't bother to sew their names on the backs of the uniforms. They just put them there with Velcro.

I have an Alka-Seltzer bat. You know-plop, plop, fizz, fizz, when the pitcher sees me walking up there he says, 'Oh, what a relief it is'.

Every season has its peaks and valleys. What you have to try to do is eliminate the Grand Canyon.

My biggest problem in the big leagues is that I can't figure out how to spend forty-three dollars in meal money.

The game is full of peaks and valleys, the key is to avoid the Grand Canyon.

Good mothers are underrated, just like good defense.

They wanted me to play third like Brooks so I did play like Brooks - Mel Brooks.

He (Ozzie Smith) plays like he's on a mini-trampoline or wearing helium kangaroo shorts.

If someone from Germany or somewhere, who had no idea what baseball was, saw Kruk play, he'd wonder what the beer truck driver was doing playing first base.

If everyone were like him (Mitch Williams) I wouldn't play. I'd find a safer way to make a living.

The only way to fight a feeling is with a feeling.

Personally, I always felt times aren't so excellent as are performances.

Sometimes you don't have to search out danger, sometimes danger finds you

The world will always punish the few people with special talents the rest of us don’t recognize as real.

Mathematics is man's own handiwork, subject only to the limitations imposed by the laws of thought.

The sexual act is in time what the tiger is in space.

One of the Internet's strengths is its ability to help consumers find the right needle in a digital haystack of data.

The old Lena is dead.

I complete what I start.

A person incapable of imaging another world than given to him by his senses would be subhuman, and a person who identifies his imaginary world with the world of sensory fact has become insane.