Who watches golf on TV? Who calls eight friends over and gets a keg of beer? Landscapers, I guess. They sit around the TV, yelling, "Will you look at that golf path?Pure pea gravel."

Whoever came up with ice fishing must have had the worst marriage on the planet.

I shop at a computer store called 'Your Crap's Already Obsolete'.

The process of writing has something infinite about it. Even though it is interrupted each night, it is one single notation, and it seems most true when it eschews artistic devices of any sort.

It is only when you trust in God that you can make it life

Raise your love so high that anger cannot reach it.

My mom is a teacher, my dad was a writer for television, his dad was a writer for television, and combining those two has been sort of the goal of my life.

Everyone needs reality to punch them in the face every once in a while. Keeps you on guard.

Self awareness allows you to self-correct.

It's not the number of years that makes you old, but the idea that you are getting old.

It is my intention to make no provision herein for my son Christopher or my daughter Christina for reasons which are well known to them.

There's a difference between feeling like I don't need to explain and deliberately confusing you. If the impression is that I'm deliberately confusing you, that is not what I am trying to do at all.

Louis Armstrong, who learned to be in exquisite dress, came from the bottom, and he's not a trash can.