Why are they called a-part-ments, when they're all stuck together?

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.

If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof?

If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?

Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.

When a great man stands on a land for a moment, the land becomes not just a great land for a moment, but a great landmark!

Christians are not powerless. We have the mighty power of God available through God the Holy Spirit, even in this world.

I spread my fingers outward, letting the knife tip of my middle finger rip the sky as it tares a rift in the moon.

Tut, tut — fame clearly isn't everything.

Falling in love and having a relationship are two different things.

There is a single light of science, and to brighten it anywhere is to brighten it everywhere.

I like guys with a nice smile. I know it's cliche, but it's so true! I like a guy with a nice smile and nice eyes.

Artistic vision comes from a mind clear enough to fall in love with what we see.

Be clear, be brief, be human.

We must not let daylight in upon the magic.