Why do scientists call it research when looking for something new?

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.

If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof?

If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?

Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.

Spare the rod and spoil the child.

Your body exists in the past and your mind exists in the future. In yoga, they come together in the present.

Read a lot. Write a lot. Have fun.

It's a pity youth is wasted on the young.

A free people ought not only to be armed, but disciplined; to which end a uniform and well-digested plan is requisite.

What happiness is there in just the memory of happiness?

No one becomes depraved all at once.

A balanced tone on Europe will free us to address in depth the domestic, economic and social agenda which we neglected throughout the last parliament.

A bad word from a colleague can darken a whole day. We need encouragement a lot more than we admit, even to ourselves.

Come on, baby, light my fire. Try to set the night on fire.