Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.

My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.

Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.

You rely too much on brain. The brain is the most overrated organ.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

All people know the same truth. Our lives consist of how we choose to distort it.

Honey! Bring down a copy of my will - and an eraser!

To you, I'm an atheist.To God, I'm the loyal opposition.

God is silent. Now if only man would shut up.

Things do not happen TO you. They happen THROUGH you.You are the co-creator of everything in your reality.

Music begins where the possibilities of language end

Glee! The great storm is over!

An affair now and then is good for a marriage. It adds spice, stops it from getting boring... I ought to know.

If men will not act for themselves, what will they do when the benefit of their effort is for all?

In Rome people spend most of their time having lunch. And they do it very well - Rome is unquestionably the lunch capital of the world.

A murderer is only an extroverted suicide.

I am a Libertarian Republican in the Goldwater style.

We should be involved in quiet acts of selfless service.