Why don't you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?

Those are my principles, and if you don't like them...well I have others.

If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.

[He] may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot.

When Christ calls a man, he bids him come and die.

Experience has thought me that there is only one short step between Love and Hate, as there is between Life and Death.

I know where I'm going and I know the truth, and I don't have to be what you want me to be. I'm free to be what I want.

No matter how much proponents of 'intelligent design' try to clothe their views in the apparel of science, it is what it is: religion. Whose intelligence? Whose design?

Dear Lord,” she said in a strangled whisper. “I can bear it for a while...but please don't let it hurt forever.

If world peace is to be established, peace in the individual must be established first. Transcendental Meditation directly brings peace in the individual life.

Baseball can have its perfect dimensions, its undeniable drama, but hockey, for all its wrongs, still has the potential to deliver a momentary, flashing magic that is found in no other game we play.

The fact remains that we are invited to forget ourselves on purpose, cast our awful solemnity to the wind, and join in the general Dance.

Human rights means that each individual should be treated with respect, dignity and equality.

Life will defend itself no matter how small it is.