Why is it that most of the folks I know think "personal growth" is caused entirely by those second and third helpings of biscuits and gravy?

When you walk through a bad neighborhood, you don't want a poodle by your side. You want a Rottweiler.

Life is too short to have anything but delusional notions about yourself.

I'm forbidden fruit. Once you go to certain households, mommy doesn't want you to see that dirty man who sticks his tongue out and spits out blood and all that stuff.

Rock is about finding who you are. You don't necessarily have to play your instrument very well at all. You can just barely get by and you can be in a rock band.

There’s an old adage that says that money is the root of all evil. Bullshit. Lack of money is the root of all evil.

The death of rock was not a natural death. Rock did not die of old age. It was murdered.

In time of war, if you go through a bad neighborhood, I don't want a little French poodle, I want a Rottweiler on my hands.

James Bond has a license to kill, rockstars have a license to be outrageous. Rock is about grabbing people's attention.

It's hard to see your destination when you're focused on the cracks in the sidewalk.

When you really think about it, I'm not delusional enough to think that what I do is important to life as we know it on this planet. No. But neither is what you do.

People do not have to be dreary to be good.

But what is after all the happiness of mere power? There is a greater happiness possible than to be lord of heaven and earth that is the happiness of being truly loved.

I pride myself on being down-to-earth. I’m from the Midwest. People who go into show business are screwed up. I romanticized about having a serene life.

I don't think we get a choice in who we fall for," Ian whispers. "I think we just do.

The grand thing about the human mind is that it can turn its own tables and see meaninglessness as ultimate meaning.

In order for this team to win the game, the quarterback has to throw the ball.

The eye of a human being is a microscope, which makes the world seem bigger than it really is.

Grace reached over and began stroking her fingers through my hair. I closed my eyes and let her drive me crazy.

...things I had come to find humor in would make your honest man swoon.

When life gets you down, just remember these three words of wisdom. "Bonk!", "Zap!", and "Yowsers!"