Why should we tell kidnappers, murderers, and embezzlers their rights? If they don't know their rights, they shouldn't be in the business.

All the problems we face in the United States today can be traced to an unenlightened immigration policy on the part of the American Indian.

No Taxes. Let's just tip the government 15% if they do a good job.

I must choose my words carefully in order to avoid any negative interpretation. Among politicians, this is a tactic known as lying.

Assuming either the Left Wing or the Right Wing gained control of the country, it would probably fly around in circles.

I read an article that said one in five Americans thinks Elvis is alive. I want to find those morons and get them registered to vote for me.

I am neither left wing nor right wing. I am middle-of-the-bird.

Having a comic in the White House will assure stability in foreign relations. The world will continue to respond to foreign initiatives by saying, 'You must be joking.'

We have nothing to fear but fear itself...and of course the boogieman.

Deep down, I happen to be very shallow.

If Iowa is the 'heart' land, what part of the human body is Los Angeles?

I blinked at her, suddenly loathing her to the depths of my soul. Not only was she probably rather evil, and definitely thoroughly unpleasant, but she also didn't read.

There’s nothing mysterious about Cosmic Ordering, it’s simply a method used to transmute thought into reality.

You’re playing with a blow torch, andit’s pointed at your head. Think about what you’re saying.

The principle of tolerance and respect for freedom promoted by the reforms of the Second Vatican Council are today being manipulated and erroneously taken too far.

Don't expect the theatre to satisfy the habits of its audience, but to change them.

Day Play We play all day. Night Fight We fight all night.

To perceive means to immobilize. To say this is to say that we seize, in the act of perception, something which outruns perception itself.

The talents lost--the moments run To waste--the sins of act, of thought, Ten thousand deeds of folly done, And countless virtues cherish'd not.

Language is my bugbear. Everyone says things now like 'I was sat' instead of 'I was sitting', which just sounds so ugly.

life is crap but, every day is an experience