With the birth of the artist came the inevitable afterbirth... the critic

My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.

As long as the world is turning and spinning, we're gonna be dizzy and we're gonna make mistakes.

I've been accused of vulgarity. I say that's bullshit.

If you stand on a soapbox and trade rhetoric with a dictator you never win.

Hope for the Best. Expect the worst. Life is a play. We're unrehearsed.

Life literally abounds in comedy if you just look around you.

If presidents can't do it to their wives, they do it to their country.

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die.

Humor is just another defense against the universe.

I don't know what to say so I'll just say what's in my heart...badoom, badoom, badoom.

In a world plagued with commonplace tragedies, only one thing exists that truly has the power to save lives, and that is love.

They did not know it was impossible, so they did it. Mark Twain

Music is all about leadership and there ain't really a lot of leaders.

If it adapts itself to what the majority of our society wants, art will be a meaningless recreation.

Only an armed people can be truly free. Only an unarmed people can ever be enslaved.

Leave the President's family business to him. You will have plenty to do without trying to manage the First Family. They are likely to do fine without your help.

To remain healthy a man must have some goal, some purpose in life that he can respect and be proud to work for.

I'm not going to let fear rule my life. I'd rather be able to know that I've made a choice that's right for me, than saying yes because I don't want my agents to be upset with me.

A little boy who's discovered the monster under the bed is actually real, and it's screwing Mommy.

She was trying to get rid of a religious hangover.