Wives and such are constantly filling up any refrigerator they have a claim on, even its ice-compartment, with irrelevant rubbish like food.

The first, indeed the only, requirement of a diet is that it should lose you weight without reducing your alcoholic intake by the smallest degree.

The rewards for being sane may not be very many, but knowing what's funny is one of them.

If you can't annoy somebody, there is little point in writing.

Only a world without love strikes me as instantly and decisively more terrible than one without music.

If you are using an adverb, you have got the verb wrong.

A bad review may spoil your breakfast, but you shouldn't allow it to spoil your lunch.

Self criticism must be my guide to action, and the first rule for its employment is that in itself it is not a virtue, only a procedure.

It is natural and harmless in English to use a preposition to end a sentence with.

Consciousness was upon him before he could get out of the way.

Women are really much nicer than men: No wonder we like them.

This is how women are trained to stay indoors, she thought, the idea echoing in her mind like a gravesong. This is how women are trained not to act.

Truth about tears is that, most tears are the result of a delusion

The greatest stupidity in man is not his arrogance or ignorance, it he failing to realize who he is.

Since last year I've been making the rounds talking to just about anyone who'll listen about this opportunity to re-establish a manufacturing base in the U.S.

The test of literature is, I suppose, whether we ourselves live more intensely for the reading of it.

The fields have eyes, and the woods have ears.

You don't expect me to know what to say about a play when I don't know who the author is, do you? . . . If it's by a good author, it's a good play, naturally. That stands to reason.

Truth, of course, must of necessity be stranger than fiction, for we have made fiction to suit ourselves.

He ran a gas station down in St. Louis. No, Mahatma Gandhi was a great leader of the 20th century.

It's all about commerce. Movies are not made like paintings, where you can make them for free and put them at the side. Movies are supposed to make money.