Women don't have a sense of humor. They don't need one. The Almighty made them as a permanent joke on men. From which one may logically deduce tha the Almighty is a female.

I deserve passion," she said. "I deserve to be loved- in every way. I deserve a man who'll give his whole heart, not the part he isn't using at the moment.

Prying into others' private affairs is the preferred occupation of small minds.

The bigger they are, the harder they fall. And the better the world liked seeing them fall.

Why must women stay quietly? Why must we be little moons, each of us stuck in our little orbit, revolving around a planet that is some man? Why can't we be other planets? Why must we be moons?

We've been wed more than a month. Since it appears you mean to stay, I might as well give you leave to call me by my christian name. It is preferable, at any rate, to 'clodpole.

They were perfectly suited. They would speak of books the livelong day and night and bore everyone else but themselves to distraction.

He was a man. Men always had lewd thoughts. It was perfectly natural and normal

I should like to see you try.

I'm no good at being good.

Let me explain something to you, he said. If you want to get something out of a man, dashing out his brains against a lamppost isn't the way to do it.

Atheism is not a philosophy

I gave up my base in popular culture when I left the Tonight Show.

Good thoughts are blessed guests, and should be heartily welcomed, well fed, and much sought after. Like rose leaves, they give out a sweet smell if laid up in the jar of memory.

I'm always writing a new book even when books are being shopped around, and none of my books has been published in the order that they have been written.

Compassion makes no distinction between friends and enemies, neighbors and outsiders, compatriots and foreigners. Compassion is the gate to human community.

Morale is good; troops are confident; leaders are capable.

Ladies of the choir, I want you to sound like twenty-two women having babies without chloroform.

He realized at last that the arguments of pessimism were powerless to comfort him

Unimaginative people are spared quite a lot.

Evangelism is not salesmanship. It is not urging people, pressing them, coercing them, overwhelming them, or subduing them. Evangelism is telling a message. Evangelism is reporting good news.