Women should not be allowed on juries where the accused is a stud.

If Thomas Jefferson thought taxation without representation was bad, he should see how it is with representation.

Poverty is not the root cause of crime.

Liberals attempt through judicial activism what they cannot win at the ballot box.

We're not sexists, we're chauvinists - we're male chauvinist pigs, and we're happy to be because we think that's what men were destined to be. We think that's what women want.

End results that work that don’t involve government threaten liberals.

You know why there's a Second Amendment? In case the government fails to follow the first one.

Styrofoam and plastic milk jugs are biodegradable! Do you know what isn't biodegradable? Paper!

I think cigars are just a tremendous addition to the enjoyment of life.

The NAACP should have riot rehearsal. They should get a liquor store and practice robberies.

In a country of children where the option is Santa Claus or work, what wins?

My best friend is the man who in wishing me well wishes it for my sake.

Arianna Huffington is unattractive both inside and out. I fully understand why her former husband left her for a man - he made a good decision.

Every leaf speaks bliss to me, fluttering from the autumn tree.

Refraining from violence is not a sign of weakness in one's faith but a sign that one's faith is unshakeable

What exactly did we learn in kindergarten? Nothing we wouldn't have learned if we;d stayed home. Okay, we learned that sometimes, by the time you get to the bathroom, it's too late.

The chief recommendation is modesty, then dutiful conduct toward parents, then affection for kindred.

It's much easier to put yourself out there under the guise of a character. You get a different name, different habits, different words. When I have to just be Nathan, that's when I feel vulnerable.

Religious concepts and vocabulary are certainly censored in these textbooks.

I try to know what I need to know. I make sure to know what I want to know. (Nero Wolfe)

If I had my own world I'd build you an empire from here to the far lands to spread love like violence!