Work is work if you're paid to do it, and it's a pleasure if you pay to be allowed to do it.

Trust everybody, but cut the cards.

A man's idea in a game of cards is war, cruel, devastating, and pitiless. A lady's idea of it is a combination of larceny, embezzlement and burglary.

A fanatic is a man that does what he thinks the Lord would do if He knew the facts of the case.

The past always looks better than it was; it's only pleasant because it isn't here.

Swearing was invented as a compromise between running away and fighting.

That is, no matther whether th' constitution follows th' flag or not, th' supreme coort follows th' iliction returns.

What is instinct? It is the natural tendency in one when filled with dismay to turn to his wife.

An appeal is when you ask one court to show its contempt for another court.

Most vegetarians look so much like the food they eat that they can be classified as cannibals.

I niver knew a pollytician to go wrong ontil he's been contaminated by contact with a business man.

Words are the small change of thought.

I read somewhere that some people believe that the entire universe is a matrix of living thought. And I said, "Man, if that's not a definition of God, I don't know what is.

To the extent that we live in a postmodern world and it shapes the concrete circumstances of our daily lives, I would say postmodernism affects my work or influences my work.

Behind all the years of practice and all the hours of glory waits that inexorable terror of living without the game.

LA Clippers should come to Louisville

The most difficult matter is not so much to change the world as yourself.

If slaughter houses had glass walls, would we even be having this debate?

I don't know that I'm 'hangdog'. That suggests someone skulking around, unengaged. I'm not. I'm 'engaged', believe me. I have just got a slightly sad face.

My children, the secret of religion lies not in theories but in practice.

My thoughts by night are often filled With visions false as fair: For in the past alone, I build My castles in the air.