Wow, the entire network of anchors has been hired to be the press secretary.

You can truly grieve for every officer who's been lost in the line of duty in this country, and still be troubled by cases of police overreach.

I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.

There are a hell of a lot of jobs that are scarier than live comedy. Like standing in the operating room when a guy's heart stops, and you're the one who has to fix it!

We have it. The smoking gun. The evidence. The potential weapon of mass destruction we have been looking for as our pretext of invading Iraq. There's just one problem - it's in North Korea.

Religion. It's given people hope in a world torn apart by religion.

I've always liked Atlanta. And not just for the strip clubs, but the shopping and the food.

Yes, reason has been a part of organized religion, ever since two nudists took dietary advice from a talking snake.

I really like to put my name on everything, so my roommate doesn't steal it. It's really a throwback to that.

I'm too short to host a late-night talk show. It's like the bar at an amusement-park ride. You have to be six foot two or over.

If your regime is not strong enough to handle a joke, then you don't have a regime.

Everybody wants to know why we're here, so we search for that answer. We want to know who we belong to so we search for those people and all the while God is whispering, 'Here I am.

The question is, would you rather keep your secrets or keep her?

If you understand what you're doing, you're not learning anything.

When you've finished the film and everybody's already made back all their money, everybody just leaves you alone and I'm very happy. That's what it has to be like.

There could be great thrillers or great dramas or great comedies made in that world but everyone's afraid of it. So you have to do them as these crazy little independent movies.

When one looks at the ocean, they can only see that part of it which comes within their range of vision; so it is with the truth.

In general, I think, U.S. policies remain constant, going back to the Second World War. But the capacity to implement them is declining.

Writers get to know me very well. It always serves me in the end because I feel I have a deeper understanding of the character and sometimes they really like my ideas and they use them.

Sow love, reap peace. Sow meditation, reap wisdom.