Writing is the best anti-depressant.

Screw technicolor, red, and foreign languages. I dream in status updates.

An editor asked me what led me to write erotica. I replied, "A dirty mind, excess words, and an overactive sacral chakra.

Things are not always as bad as they seem. Sometimes, the darkness only makes it easier to see the light.

Inculcating the various competing - competing, note - falsehoods of the major faiths into small children is a form of child abuse, and a scandal.

Sometimes I feel like the corner in the circle.

Why do we need another station where everyone has a gun? We already have BET.

Namby-pamby little routines that don't speed up your heartbeat and make you sweat aren't worth your while.

I did plays and movies and whatever all over the place.

Successful couples love each other with complete devotion

I did vote Obama. But I've never believed in the authenticity of the two-party system.

Jasper? What do vampires do for bachelor parties? You're not taking him to a strip club, are you?

Reasoning at every step he treads, Man yet mistakes his way, Whilst meaner things, whom instinct leads, Are rarely known to stray.