Writing is the most fun you can have by yourself.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

Don't try to figure out the whole race. Just figure out where to put your foot for the starting line. Just start.

Do not blindly accept anyone's definition of your life and define it yourself.

I am going to the bad place, as is my wont.

I do not take any pleasure whatsoever in being a famous person.

A ship should not be held by a single anchor; neither should life depend upon a single hope.

I claim the right to contradict myself. I don't want to deprive myself of the right to talk nonsense, and I ask humbly to be allowed to be wrong sometimes.

Humility is becoming a lost art, but it's not difficult to practice. It means that you realize that others have been involved in your success.

Poverty can teach lessons that privilege cannot.

I can't be No. 1 with an MVP trophy. I could be No. 1 with the championship ring and the championship trophy on my fireplace.

And what does every child believe every adult capable of doing? Of actually being able to bend the world to an inner desire, exactly what the child is busily practicing in his passionate play.