Xenophobia doesn't benefit anybody unless you're playing high-stakes Scrabble.

Here in Hollywood you can actually get a marriage license printed on an Etch-A-Sketch.

The radical right is so homophobic that they're blaming global warming on the AIDS quilt.

Washington, DC is to lying what Wisconsin is to cheese.

The easiest job in the world has to be coroner. Surgery on dead people. What's the worst thing that could happen? If everything went wrong, maybe you'd get a pulse.

We need anything politically important rationed out like Pez: small, sweet, and coming out of a funny, plastic head.

You've got bad eating habits if you use a grocery cart in 7-Eleven.

Maybe democrats will eventually turn on Obamacare when they realize you might need a photo I.D. to participate in the program.

There is a chalk outline slowly being drawn around common sense and most people can't identify the victim.

It's foolish to be prejudiced. There are so many reasons to hate people on an individual basis.

Liberals always feel your pain. Unless of course, they caused it.

If you're not inthe mood, you can't do that stuff right.

There is no victory without a war, no prize without a price, no crown without a cross

All for one and one for all.

Things that look like an 'overnight success' typically are not.

The persecution of the innovator and protestant has always been inspired by fear on the part of constituted authority of having its infallibility questioned and its power undermined.

For there is no one so great or mighty that he can avoid the misery that will rise up against him when he resists and strives against God.

All Australians understand that high-quality, reliable and affordable broadband is a critical part of the infrastructure our nation needs to prosper in coming years.

A kitchen is a good place to be, almost always the best place in the house.

Love is like a flower, even the most beautiful kind dies.

I don't recognize my former self. Like I'm on the outside looking in at my life. Who is that guy?