Ye ken, we've been robbin' and running aroound on all kinds o' worlds for a lang time, and I'll tell ye this: The universe is a lot more comp-li-cated than it looks from the ooutside.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

People focus on role models

There are very few monsters who warrant the fear we have of them.

A patriot is a fool in ev'ry age.

The worst thing I can say about democracy is that it has tolerated the right hon. Gentleman for four and a half years.

I bought singles until I started working properly and then I started buying albums, so this brings back a lot of teenage memories from being in London before I got work

I'm a pretty intense person. And I don't know if intense is fun. I put myself through the wringer. That's just how I work.

I think I've been rather reasonable about this whole situation." "How do you figure?" "They are still breathing, aren't they?

I was pretty much prepared because I was already playing in extremely good ways when I arrived from Europe because I played jazz four or five years before I arrived here.

I come from a very warm island, where colors are very important, very vibrant, and obviously the color has been an influence on my work.

These precious things, let them bleed.