Yeah, well, asparagus is good for me, but it still makes me want to throw up.

Good memories are like charms...Each is special. You collect them, one by one, until one day you look back and discover they make a long, colorful bracelet.

Your mind creates your reality. If you expect nothing, you open up the universe to give you options. If you expect the worst, you usually get it.

A friend of mine once defined love as finding someone you can talk to late into the night

Some poeple just don't have what it takes to appreciate a cookie.

Oh great. Yoda captured us.

Who, last time I'd checked, was still on our official archenemy list. (Yes, we have to keep a list. It's kind of sad.)

They call me, The Sharkalator

At that moment I had no mind to change, or not change, or throw against the nearest wall.

I don't get a chance to be funny with the thrillers. I like to be funny, and I think I am really funny. So with 'Middle School: The Worst Years of My Life', it was fun to let loose.

I had to give him props, but how annoying of him to be a hero when I was trying so hard to dislike him. It was downright selfish.

I do not read for I have renounced life, I read because one life is just not enough for me.

A man can succeed at almost anything for which he has unlimited enthusiasm.

A woman uses her intelligence to find reasons to support her intuition.

The Bible comes both to warn and to encourage and always to turn us again to the Lord Jesus Christ.

I found all these stupid pictures of cats at the beach, and I was like, "They get it, man. They totally get it."

If you forget the words to your own song, you can always claim artistic license. Forget the words to the national anthem and you're screwed.

If you have been wise and successful I congratulate you. Unless you are unable to forget how successful you have been, then I pity you.

The Titanic will protect itself.

Better be killed than frightened to death.

I'm not into digital marketing, downloading, or streaming - I've always been a man of the theaters.