Yesterday's gone on down the river and you can't get it back.

True maturity is only reached when a man realizes he has become a father figure to his girlfriends' boyfriend - and he accepts it

Self-parody is the first portent of age.

Only a rank degenerate would drive 1,500 miles across Texas without eating a chicken fried steak.

Backward is just not a natural direction for Americans to look - historical ignorance remains a national characteristic.

If you wait, all that happens is that you get older.

Uva uvum vivendo varia fit

People would be bored shitless if they had to love only the good in someone they care about.

A woman's love is like the morning dew. It's just as likely to settle on a horse turd as a rose.

Incompetents invariably make trouble for people other than themselves.

If you want one thing too much it’s likely to be a disappointment. The healthy way is to learn to like the everyday things, like soft beds and buttermilk—and feisty gentlemen.

Attract and get attracted to that which is your ultimate purpose.

I always assumed it owed more to the fact that he didn't like me.

he needed the security of other bodies.

Actually, the only memory I have of being a Cub Scout was trying to get my hat back. That was all I did. Run back and forth at my bus stop going "Quit it."

I grew up in Winnipeg, in the Canadian midwest, the fifth child. It was a great household to grow up in - I was loved to sweet death.

God, you’re sexy when you talk Psy.

It is absurd to think that a man can believe in Christ, with his heart, and it not have a radical affect on the rest of his life.

Rainbow drops - suck them and you can spit in six different colours.

They can say whatever they want to say, but it is going to be hard, my friend, to duplicate me.

I was taught that you didn't want to be part of the group - that it was better to do your own thing.