Yo Mama’s so old, her memory is in black and white.

Yo Mama’s so ugly, her Mama had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her.

Yo Mama’s so ugly, her dentist treats her by mail order.

Yo Mama’s so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.

Yo Mama’s so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest, they said, “Sorry, no professionals.

Among the mutations that have affected the knowledge of things ... only one, which began a century and a half ago ... has allowed the figure of man to appear.

When you're not sure your anger is justified, the thing to do is ask yourself exactly where it's coming from.

Certainties are arrived at only on foot.

To the wingless a more interesting phenomenon is their (W/E Egg) dissimilarity in every particular except shape and size.

Turn the goddam music up! My heart feels like an alligator!

If you don't feel that you are possibly on the edge of humiliating yourself, of losing control of the whole thing, then probably what you are doing isn't very vital.

You spend more of the game preparing to win in the final seconds. And that is what separates winners from losers.

I do not feel betrayed. ... He has a fine record. He is a national hero. (On Oliver L North's work)

Since dictating the Bible, and hiring a perfect race of ministers to explain it, God has never done much but creep around and try to catch us disobeying it.

Always acknowledge your position in the food chain... They eat because you grow the food.