You always pass failure on the way to success.

I keep going because if you stop, you stop. Why retire? Inspire.

Dont retire - inspire...Theres a lot to be done

Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted the whole day.

Look, I come from vaudeville, I come from burlesque, I come from heartaches, I come from sadness, I come from gladness, I come from work and sweat and respect for the craft.

I hear Jerry Falwell every Sunday here talking about the devil and Hollywood. . . . I'm gonna write him a letter. Hollywood wasn't built on filth and dirt - it was built on talent.

I don't regret anything I've ever done. I only wish I could have done more.

Life is an infiltration course. We all try and get through it. We all try and get through it unscathed - maybe not hurt, not bruised. No bones broken, maybe a few hearts here and there.

And that's the way I have always lived, for the laughs – today. N-O-W. No Other Way.

Someone once asked me what I want on my epitaph when I pass away. Just the words 'I tried.' That's what this game of life is all about. Trying. There's the tryers, the criers, and the liars.

A lot of people have asked me how short I am. Since my last divorce, I think I'm about $100,000 short.

He hears but half who hears one party only.

Totalitarianism surpasses autocracy.

I admire pop songs that are perfect at three minutes.

Occasionally in my travels I meet people who have pushed too far into the nagual. These individuals are not too balanced but they have made great journeys in the unknown.

Single mothers are raising more of America's children than ever before.

I'm interested in characters that are complex people.

My only goal was to make the largest profit possible for my employer. I was caught in a spiral that - with the support of my bosses - continued to lead up and up.

I am very superstitious about toasts. I never toast with water, and I'm very careful to make eye contact with everyone I toast with.

Time is wealth, and unlike money when it is gone you cannot replace it.

We can observe the Fourth Commandment by loving visits to our aging grandparents