You can't be a person and a lady. If you're a person, you can open the damned door yourself.

Though intelligence is powerless to modify character, it is a dab hand at finding euphemisms for its weaknesses.

I simply haven't the nerve to imagine a being, a force, a cause which keeps the planets revolving in their orbits and then suddenly stops in order to give me a bicycle with three speeds.

Posing was the first job I did in which I understood what I was doing.

In an expanding universe, time is on the side of the outcast.

Fashion is what you adopt when you don't know who you are.

My mother protected me from the world and my father threatened me with it.

The poverty from which I have suffered could be diagnosed as 'Soho' poverty. It comes from having the airs and graces of a genius and no talent.

Vice is its own reward.

Never keep up with the Joneses. Drag them down to your level.

No effort is required to define or even attain happiness, but enormous concentration is needed to abandon everything else.

If you get stuck, get up, and go ahead.

You may be a lady but you are still the man!

Whether a thought is spoken or not, it is a real thing and has powers of reality.

You give up a lot when you enter the years of parenting. It's a sacrifice.

While many comics have a secret persona, I fundamentally want to be myself.

True statement: Live it, love it, leave the wold better off than when you got here.

I didn't know anything about writers. It never occurred to me they were regular people and that I could grow up to become one, even though I loved to make up stories inside my head.

But no one has a right to coerce others to act according to his own view of truth.

My goal was always getting my work out in the world, and in many ways, I feel like the luckiest person alive.

When you look into the eyes of an animal youve rescued, you cant help but fall in love.