You can't create a monster, then whine when it stomps on a few buildings.

It's not our fault our generation has short attention spans, Dad. We watch an appalling amount of TV.

Everybody sort of questioned why we get married on New Year's Day, and of course, the avid sports fans wouldn't come, because they had to watch the Rose Bowl or whatever that is on that day.

Science has already proven the dangers of smoking, alcohol, and Chinese food, but I can still ruin soft drinks for everyone!.

Romance is dead - it was acquired in a hostile takeover by Hallmark and Disney, homogenized, and sold off piece by piece.

Being myself didn't work. Being someone else didn't work. Maybe I just wasn't meant to have friends.

A man who envies our family is a man who needs help.

Oh no, the dead have risen and they're voting Republican.

Do you know what it's like to be the kind of girl that boys never talk to and then suddenly, a boy talks to you?

I can only drive slowly.""That's all right.""And I can only do left turns."Rose ran downstairs, grabbed a road atlas, and ran triumphantly back up again. "Wales is left! Look! It's left all the way!

Having money is a way of being free of money

Some madness doesn't act mad to begin with, sometimes it will knock politely at the door, and when you let it in, it'll simply sit in the corner without a fuss - and grow.

Hold your head high stick your chest out. You can make it. It gets dark sometimes but morning comes. ... Keep hope alive.

By the time you swear you're his, Shivering and sighing. And he vows his passion is, Infinite, undying. Lady make note of this -- One of you is lying.

I have a four-month-old and I also have a toddler, so that takes up all of my time.

I believe all religions are becoming obsolete, clinging to ancient concepts.

I was incredibly different as a child from everybody else. But really, I was just who I was. I was born that way.

Today, the average family has enough financial reserves to keep going for about three weeks. That's it.

[Rewriting is] a whole other art form; it's about craftsmanship.