You can't find a hermit to teach you herming, because of course that rather spoils the whole thing.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

I just thought I was empty and now I'm being filled...and I just wanted to keep being filled.

If you feel the need to laugh at people's weaknesses, laugh at yours first.

It's not where you are from (basically it's not based upon tradition) that determines who you are. But, it's really based upon your personality on how people will view and treat you.

I just want to challenge myself and play some different characters.

When there's no clear option, it's better to do nothing.

Leaving England was a painful decision, and we still have some regrets about it. However, at that time, the research environment for theoretical chemistry was clearly better in the U.S.

I trained for three years at drama school to be an actor - not a celebrity.

Riches are intended for the comfort of life, and not life for the purpose of hoarding riches.

Acting is all about truth and honesty, and the sensitivity that's capable of transporting you.

I really like stories, so in a way it doesn't matter for me if they are real or fiction.