You can teach taste, editorial sense, but the ability to say something funny is something I've never been able to teach anyone.

Someone once defined humor as a way to keep from killing yourself. I keep my sense of humor and I stay alive.

You throw a perfectly straight line at the audience and then, right at the end, you curve it. Good jokes do that.

Glamour: the indefinable something about a girl with a big bosom.

Don’t always trust what you see. In a bull market even a duck looks like a swan.

It is my favorite thing, I think, that I have ever seen. Sometimes I catch myself staring at it and forget my duties. It seems big enough to contain everything anyone could ever feel.

The facts are always less than what really happened.

Apparent failure may hold in its rough shell the germs of a success that will blossom in time and bear fruit throughout eternity.

To love and to labor is the sum of living.

Humility is always proof of intelligence

The opportunity to record the song came when Phil Collins' record label, Atlantic, was doing a tribute album to him and they asked all these different artists to do renditions of his songs.

I know what my job is: I write the songs, I sing them, I play them on the piano

In the land of wild rivers, a calm river becomes either a god or a devil!

You can only have two things in life, reasons and results. Reasons don't count.