You got to harden yourself. Make, like, a shell around you. But not everyone can do it. If they got nothing to hang on to some of them screw up. They’re not in the game no more.

Standing in the corridor was a large plastic bin on wheels. He looked inside. Empty tins of dog food. That explained the spaghetti with meat sauce. Oh well, he'd eaten worse.

My gran always said I was half clever, half stupid, and half crazy.

If a wolf attacks his sheep, the shepard kills the wolf, but he eats the sheep when he's hungry.

We was half stupid, a third lucky, and three-quarters ferocious.

No such word as can't. No such word as babagoozle neither!

Writing is a bit like being a god

He knew one thing for sure, though. Whatever happened, Matt would have some handy excuse. He'd make up some story or change an old one, find some dumb quote to explain it all.

I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired, ' said Maxie.'I know how that feels, ' said Blue.'I think some Pharaoh had that carved on his tomb, ' Maxie added.'Yeah? Times don't change much, do they?

Remember what I done for you here today, ' he shouted and passed out.

I’m different, ” said the Kid. “My gran always said I was half clever, half stupid, and half crazy.

Everything around me affirmed there was nothing else I could do – yet everything inside me cried that I was not doing enough.

There is usually less romance in marriage than in any other relationship of life. But the general idea concerning marriage is that it is all or nearly all romance.

The events with Henry III happened, obviously the way it happened, liberties were taken.

I don't exaggerate - I just remember big.

It's bad taste to be wise all the time, like being at a perpetual funeral.

The voice of the people has about it something divine: for how otherwise can so many heads agree together as one?

Trying to determine the structure of a protein by UV spectroscopy was like trying to determine the structure of a piano by listening to the sound it made while being dropped down a flight of stairs.

If you take out the team in teamwork, it's just work. Now who wants that?

The most important thing is to write material that YOU think is funny. If you don't think it's funny, but you're convinced that other people will think it is, well they won't.

I don't think there's a petty system of heaven and hell. The love of God is much more forgiving. I'm not a believer in a wrathful God at all.