You gotta make your own fun. That's right, listen to that mother of two, she knows what I'm talking about.

Pre-mature ejaculation. Let's talk about it. Premature ejaculation. That's a pretty fancy term for, "Ooooooh Oh no. This has never happened before."

My gym has two-pound weights. If you're using two-pound weights, how did you even open the door to the gym? What's your dream? To pump up and open your mail?

Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving, and I call those people 'the cops.' But you know, sometimes, you've just got no choice; those kids gotta get to school!

Let's say you're in a situation where crystal meth can help you. Like, I don't know, you have too many teeth.

Remember when you're young and you think your dad is Superman? And then you grow up and realized he's just a drunk who wears a cape.

Don't get me wrong, I like to cuddle. But there is such a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so that they can't get away.

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin.

Women have all the power because women have all the vaginas.

You know, men and women are a lot alike in certain situations. Like when they're both on fire - they're exactly alike.

You ever make fun of someone so much, you think you should thank them for all the good times you've had?

I don’t care if people say that I am staying hungry and foolish.

A product should be made intentionally

An intelligent, informed mind is more powerful than a loaded gun.

It's not wrinkles. I just have too much skin for the size of my face.

Yesterday's errors let yesterday cover.

If you want to sing out, sing out, and if you want to be free, be free, cause there's a million ways to be, you know that there are.

I love directing Shakespeare on film. It's fantastic that the actors would do exactly the same thing and be true to their part.

I started being a photographer because I liked fashion. I liked the idea of dressing up and changing my look. I got earrings, dyed my hair. I would dress like a fashion photo.

Caltech was a meat grinder like I could never have imagined.

There were a lot of artists in St. Ives. In fact, since the time of Whistler, St. Ives has been noted as an artist colony.