You have to be careful on the deck, because of the "hatches," which are holes placed around a sailboat at random to increase the insurance rates.

You should definitely visit the Louvre, a world-famous art museum where you can view, at close range, the backs of thousands of other tourists trying to see the Mona Lisa.

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.

Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.

It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person's plate.

Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only more intelligent.

The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious people, and then they come after you with machetes.

Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.

Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.

Sometimes the biggest disasters aren't noticed at all - no one's around to write horror stories.

One can repent of a sin and have done with it

In hell there is no other punishment than to begin over and over again the tasks left unfinished in your lifetime.

Ladies, it is not your education, status or personality that has brought you here but the elegance of God which was still and still working upon you.

It's just that I learned a while ago that the best way to get people to like you is not to like them too much.

Today, as never before, the fates of men are so intimately linked to one another that a disaster for one is a disaster for everybody.

Invest in businesses any idiot could run, because someday one will.

Developing expertise or assets that are not easily copied is essential; otherwise you're just a middleman.

I think I've done more recording in the past 10 years than most people, but it's all been directed toward film composing and soundtracks. Just the same, it's been great.

All human suffering springs from unbridled desire. Unless one extricates oneself from the clutch of greed, one will not free himself from the fetters of sorrow.