You have to change those diapers every day. When those directions on the side of the Pampers box say, 'holds 6-12 pounds' they're not kidding!

I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.

You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't.

You might be a redneck if...your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.

Pride is the first step in people unraveling and companies unraveling and relationships unraveling.

If your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold.

Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.

You might be a redneck if going to the bathroom involves shoes and a flashlight.

When you decide to be better than you were yesterday and maintain this attitude, you are going to the peak.

It's a long life, sweetheart, and time heals all wounds.

To think too much is a disease.

I tend to prioritize emotional realism above the known laws of time and space, and when you do that, it's inevitable that strange things happen. Which can be quite enjoyable, I think.

Imagination is the deceptive part in man, the mistress of error and falsehood.

What we're going to see is the emergence of the lone wolf rather than the planning of large numbers of people to carry out large attacks...Explosives are getting more sophisticated.

I'm a New Yorker. I like the big streets and the big buildings. It's a great place to walk.

We cherish too, the Poppy red That grows on fields where valor led, It seems to signal to the skies That blood of heroes never dies.

A lot of people recognize me or feel that they know me. A lot of times when I speak, they recognize my voice. It's fun, it's exciting. It's always good feedback.

When I was younger and was working as a Dia guard I would go to see everything. I went to every opening. I was really interested in seeing and learning as much as I could.