You just never know when it might be cookie time. And, that is what the dogs have taught me.

I sometimes look into the face of my dog Stan and see a wistful sadness and existential angst, when all he is actually doing is slowly scanning the ceiling for flies.

A wacky, trendy outfit on a guy over 40 indicates he's got big issues.

Beware the man who doesn't ask you any questions about yourself on your first date.

Men who have a lot of charm have it in place of something real that you are eventually going to want from them and find that they do not have.

No one would argue against the fact that L.A. leads the country in opportunities for being hip and pretentious.

A more complex - but only slightly more original - way to feel out of it is available at the hip and pretentious nightclubs and bars along the Sunset Strip.

It's just like magic. When you live by yourself, all your annoying habits are gone!.

My goal was always getting my work out in the world, and in many ways, I feel like the luckiest person alive.

The day is divided into two important sections: Mealtimes and everything else.

Every moment of your life that is not a complete nightmare is happiness.

The rich think this land is theirs though they have never earned the right to call it theirs.

Isn’t it wonderful to give birth to your own kind?

Simplicity clarity singleness: these are the attributes that give our lives power and vividness and joy.

I envy Pete Sampras's dullness. I wish I could emulate his spectacular lack of inspiration.

A friend is someone who knows you and loves you for what you were and who you are, and who also shares your hopes and dreams for who you can become.

An excessive indulgence in the pleasures of social life constitutes the great interests of a luxuriant and opulent age.

Je vis, je meurs; je me br u" le et me noie. I live, I die; I am on fire and I drown.

Don't be afraid to close your eyes and dream, but then open your eyes and see

The Republicans that want to get rid of [Donald] Trump are a minority.

Writing is not hard. Just get paper and pencil, sit down, and write as it occurs to you. The writing is easy-it's the occurring that's hard.