You just try to be true to your idea of what is funny and what is also interesting.

You don't need people’s opinion on a fact. You might as well have a poll asking: ‘Which number is bigger, 15 or 5?’ or ‘Do owls exist?’ or ‘Are there hats?'

Drug companies are a bit like high school boyfriends - they're much more concerned with getting inside you than being effective once they're in there.

What a tiresome place America would be if freedom meant we all had to think alike or be the same color or wear the same gray flannel suit! That road leads to the conformity of the graveyard!

News is not a game show. You don't win a car if you happen to be right.

Economics is like the Dutch language - I'm told it makes sense, but I have my doubts.

One thing that America is objectively exceptional at is overreacting whenever anyone accuses them of not being exceptional.

The Confederate flag is one of those things that should only be seen on t-shirts, belt buckles and bumper stickers to help the rest of us identify the worst people in the world.

Anybody who claims to be excited for April Fools' Day is probably a sociopath.

Life is a short walk. There is so little time and so much living to achieve.

My fight is not for racial sameness but for racial equality and against racial prejudice and discrimination.

Cause channeled in the wrong direction is indistinguishable from handcap

The kind of woman whose goodness is oppressive

I used to watch 'The Waltons' and sob because my family was nothing like that. We had a cruel sense of humor in my family.

Crime is going down everywhere but in the New York City Police Department.

Know then thyself, presume not God to scan; The proper study of mankind is man.

I'm not particularly pre-occupied with the husband / baby thing. Besides I have a dog.

The way you lose the gospel is not by denying it, but by assuming it.

Network marketing is really the greatest source of grass-roots capitalism, because it teaches people how to take a small bit of capital, that is your time, and build the American dream.

Necessity when threatening is more powerful than device of man.

Be here. Be present. Wherever you are, be there.