You know what a fan letter is - it's just an inky raspberry.

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?

No one party can fool all of the people all of the time; that's why we have two parties

I always like to go to Washington D.C. It gives me a chance to visit my money.

My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?

I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano.

The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's really pissed off.

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

I don't do a lot of political jokes. Too many are getting elected.

No matter how safe and beautiful it is, a cage is still a cage.

Success breeds success.

Life is not supposed to be easy. Stop working so hard to make it that way. Go ahead and handle it!

One thing I've learned about the NBA is that you can have one good year, but you've always got to be progressing and working and making yourself better.

Phooey, I say, on all white-shoe college boys who edit their campus literary magazines. Give me an honest con man any day.

I'm not asexual. I'm arelationshipal.

I always considered Ray Harryhausen's work so fine that it was way out of my league: in terms of realism and naturalism, in terms of animal movement.

It is wonderful what a difference learning makes upon people even in the common intercourse of life, which does not appear to be much connected with it.

The new-school hip-hop generation exists with a mandate to 'keep it real'; this has to do with embracing a hard-nosed truth about the world and letting the chips fall where they may.

Do not seek perfection in a changing world. Instead, perfect your love.