You know what they say when a supermodel gets pregnant? Now she's eating for one.

According to a new survey, 90% of men say their lover is also their best friend. Which is really kind of disturbing when you consider man's best friend is his dog.

Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.

Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!

You can't stay mad at somebody who makes you laugh.

Politics is just show business for ugly people.

CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it.

I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, 'I'd like some fries.' The girl at the counter said, 'Would you like some fries with that?'

Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said today he believes life begins at conception and ends at execution.

Magic Johnson, former basketball player, may run for mayor of L.A. in the next election. Remember the good 'ol days when only qualified people ran for office like actors and professional wrestlers.

A single poemis worth a hundredcozy winter nightskind wordsand healed wounds.

My people, we stay indoors. We have keyboards. We have darkness.

There should be a point to movies. Sure, you're giving people a diversion from the cold world for a bit, but at the same time, you pass on some facts and rules and maybe a little bit of wisdom.

So much of life is paradox. So much of life is neither one thing nor the other... it's both things at the same time.

Read as few words as you like, and speak fewer, but act upon the law.

There are no friends; only moments of friendship.

I tried to laugh early on about ego and pride... I do something great and then I do something really dumb and then I laugh. You'll always be that kid.

It is wisdom that is seeking for wisdom.

I caught the preacher making love to Sister Mary Lou. God's gonna getcha for that.

Life is a picnic on a precipice.