You know who Boehner is, right? He's that orange looking guy. See, for Republicans that counts as diversity.

According to a new survey, 90% of men say their lover is also their best friend. Which is really kind of disturbing when you consider man's best friend is his dog.

Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.

Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!

You can't stay mad at somebody who makes you laugh.

Politics is just show business for ugly people.

CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it.

I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, 'I'd like some fries.' The girl at the counter said, 'Would you like some fries with that?'

Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said today he believes life begins at conception and ends at execution.

Magic Johnson, former basketball player, may run for mayor of L.A. in the next election. Remember the good 'ol days when only qualified people ran for office like actors and professional wrestlers.

Let's make beautiful music together, Emery Carmichael.

You must learn to exist with no religion, no country, no allies. You must learn to live alone in silence.

Every child deserves a home and love. Period.

Liberty is only valued when it is threatened, therefore it is the threat that highlights the value. We should be grateful to the Nadir, since they heighten the value of our liberty.

Chaos breeds life, while order breeds success.

A girl expecting rescue never learns to save herself. Even with the means, she will find her courage wanting.

It's vital to learn how to make the best of things.

The unwillingness to try is worse than any failure.

Whether you agree or disagree with Barack Obama, he is getting some things done, though not in the way most Americans would prefer or what is actually best for them.

The aristocracy of feudal parchment has passed away with a mighty rushing, and now, by a natural course, we arrive at aristocracy of the money-bag.