You might be a redneck if you have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.

I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.

You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't.

You might be a redneck if...your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.

Pride is the first step in people unraveling and companies unraveling and relationships unraveling.

If your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold.

Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.

You might be a redneck if going to the bathroom involves shoes and a flashlight.

God created war so that Americans would learn geography.

Everything has a consequence to it.

There is a difference between sin and sins. Sin is the root

The human spirit is like an elastic band. The more you stretch, the greater your capacity.

Each morning, you dress to become a different woman. Fashion helps.

Everything a man writes about himself is instructive.

The greatest gift I ever had Came from God; I call him Dad!

Willpower is breath and heartbeat of life; Life blooms in the girdle of taut willpower.

In my spare time, I paint, garden, hike and enjoy massages for my weary writer's back.

Here, for a moment, we are joined.