You might be a redneck if you need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.

You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't.

You might be a redneck if...your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.

Pride is the first step in people unraveling and companies unraveling and relationships unraveling.

If your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold.

Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.

You might be a redneck if going to the bathroom involves shoes and a flashlight.

Fred always goes with Daphne and Shaggy always sticks with Velma.""Well then, in that case, I'm Scooby.

Until we can manage time, we can manage nothing else.

Secrets upon secrets were weaving into a strange and mysterious fabric that would ultimately clothe his future.

I can choose to be happy, or choose to be miserable every day - waiting until I die.

Die Welt der Kunst & Fantasie ist die wahre, the rest is a nightmare.

The enjoyment of freedom which could be exercised without any motivation would be the real hallmark of a maniac.

My family has been my biggest inspiration - they are true role models in my life and career and they always will be.

Reading was like a drug, a dope. The novels created moods in which I lived for days.

I do not intend to be made the scapegoat of sacrifice, to be offered up as a victim to society.

The rigid cause themselves to be broken; the pliable cause themselves to be bound.